Grow

letting go of image

Shaving My Head

A Practice of Detachment, Reminder and Inspiration

Om Namah Shivaya

(I Bow To My True Identity)

ego detachment

My name is Elicia Woodford, I am 35 years old and currently living in Koh Samui, Thailand.  My business ePowerMe is about releasing thoughts, behaviors, beliefs, toxins, and stress that keep us from being who we really are and fully alive. I am launching another business called Samui Healing which is designed to provide cleansing information, services and resources to support ePowerMe’s mission. I’ve personally done many various body, mind and material cleanses this year. Cleansing is about getting rid of what we don’t need that is attached to the ego like stress, social pressure, and an image that is identified with the body and material things.  I decided to end my year of detox with a spiritual ego cleanse by shaving my head to detach from society’s pressure of looking a certain way and caring what others think.

Reasons, Reminders and Inspiration:

v    Spiritual Detox and Detachment

• Detaching from ego, image and identity

v    Source of Happiness

source of happiness

• How you feel is dependent of what you are thinking and the health of your body.  If you are overly concerned with physical appearance, and what others think, then you will cause unnecessary stress and unhappiness.
• Most people think that if they look good then they feel good.  If you dig deeper on what it is costing you in stress and worry to look good you will see that is not true. 
• Pay attention to your thoughts “My hair is too short, I wish my hair was straight/curly, my roots are showing, I want to look like Angelina Jolie, I can’t go out with this pimple, I need my teeth whitened, I wish I was skinny, my nail chipped…”
• All the physical things that seem to matter most are impermanent and will change.  Your hair will grow, your nails grow, you choose to adopt a clean natural diet and your skin and hair glow plus the extra 5 pounds comes off without trying.  With this awareness you can focus on what matters most in life: the health of your mind and body.
• I’m not saying to not care how you look and to let yourself go but instead let society’s pressure of how you should look go. Care more about what thoughts you let in your mind and what you are putting in your body.  Know what thoughts and food either feed you or deplete you.  Your happiness depends on them.
• Focus your energy up towards who you are, how you live, and your potential instead of down towards what you look like, what you have and comparing yourself to others.  Become aware by asking yourself, “Does it matter, does it make me happy and is it beneficial to my life?”
• Another thing to be aware of is how you treat others and your generosity.  When you give selflessly and are kind to others you feel good about yourself.  Practice compassion on yourself, while making changes, and you will feel good and be able to relate to others with a better understanding.

v    Cancer

prevent & heal disease

• Cancer is real and can heal.  Place importance on trying to prevent it by improving your lifestyle choices. 
• Cancer, and other illnesses, can only live in a toxic and deficient environment. The best defense towards disease is a healthy body.
• Focus on boosting your health with detox, cleansing and nutritional therapy.

v    Patience & Dedication

• Patience is needed for growth and development.
• Developing the mind with awareness and compassion for yourself and others requires practice and patience.
• Be excited to see what develops at each stage of the growth. It is about the journey and not the destination.

v    Embracing Natural Beauty

live & radiate from your heart and nature

• When you live from your heart and nature you radiate natural beauty.
• I am releasing what is not me (chemicals) to let my natural hair and self shine through.

v    Re-birth

• 2009 detachment & detox – from the things that I don’t need, that cause stress and unhappiness.
• 2010 birth & new development – caring and nurturing my mind and body like a newborn.

Let go of what you are not to find out who you are!

Credits:

Hairshaver – Dany Lopez,  samuihair@yahoo.com, +66 (0) 81 787 4893

Blue Sarong – Donated by Ta from Thai Organic Life

Photographer & Samui Healing Model - Carrie Bain

1st night

Perceptions are not real, find and know your truth!

It’s always good to ask people about places and things but to take it as it is: their perception and experience, not yours.  I’ve learned to approach other people’s opinions and even my own with a question mark and not a period. If I listened to others, I wouldn’t have stayed in Bangkok.  If I listened to my first impression then I wouldn’t have stayed either.

My view of Bangkok after the first day was very limited and I felt unsure about staying there.  I did like the small boutique hotel and friendly staff so I decided to go ahead and book the next 5 nights while they had rooms available. I end up staying in 4 different themed rooms and loved the experience.  I thought at least I didn’t have to deal with my luggage and I could always stay in the room and read.  I observed these feelings and thoughts and noticed the tendency to feel safe.

last night

The mind’s need to feel safe is deceptive and keeps you and your world small.  Moving forward with that feeling will help you grow and experience joy.

I went out to walk the streets, explored and found a whole new perspective of Bangkok.  The uncomfortable feeling I had was just the unknowing.  My first day I walked down one street which was crazy busy and polluted.  I noticed that 1 out of 5 Thais were wearing disposable mouth protectors and I assumed that it was because of the pollution. Once I explored my surrounding neighborhood (and how to cross the street going up the stairs across the pedestrian bridge) I felt empowered and was able to tune into more things around me.  I also found out later by talking to someone that the Thais wore the mouth protectors because they were concern about getting the Swine Flu, not because of the pollution. My Kundalini Yoga practice each morning helped me tremendously while adjusting to all of the newness. I trained my mind to slow down and take things slow without any set plans or “have tos”. I decided that I would do one thing (on my mental wish list) each day and to trust my intuition as I made decisions. Taking deep breaths throughout each day also helped me presence myself.

As my confidence built I explored more and my perspective of Bangkok shifted. I loved taking the Skytrain and walking around.  I didn’t feel uncomfortable at all and now I had a sense of excitement and love for the city. Being very present and aware allowed me to be in the flow, this is when everything just falls into place. I would stumble upon exactly what I was looking for everyday. My next blog will have the details of the treatments and I experienced and how I found them. On my third day I got to know the map a little better and noticed a large park a block away from where I was staying.  The first couple of days I turned left onto Silom to walk to Health Land Spa and to the BTS Skytrain.  This morning I turned right instead of left and found my favorite discovery, Lumpini Park!

favorite discovery

After the first day I could have left in search of pleasure but staying and moving in the uncomfortable lead me to the pleasure that was all around me, just one turn away.  I am remembering this lesson right now as I begin my TEFL course in Ban Phe, Thailand.  It been a lifetime ago since I utilized my left-brain to study and I’m observing my desire to do other things that I know I love instead.  I also don’t think I’ve ever sat in at a desk in a chair for 8 hours a day for a month!  I’m embracing the uncomfortable to see what I find.

way to live

Trust yourself to find your truth – explore your thoughts alone.
The week I spent in Bangkok I found myself alone, without any distractions, for the first time in my life.  Canceling my cell phone plan broke my iPhone addiction and the many distractions that came along with it: checking and responding to my email, Facebook, text messages, and phone calls.  Shut off from all communication except the Internet (on my time and only when I’m back at the hotel) I am alone with my thoughts.  When I was outside walking around the city I couldn’t understand the signs or conversations. I also didn’t know anyone or meet anyone to hangout with and talk to, which was a nice change.  I had been craving this silence and solitude for a long time.  Being truly alone helped me sit and observe my thoughts and feelings.  I had the opportunity to pause before reacting, question, and reflect on things.  A week of “active meditation” helped me find my truth, at least about Bangkok.  Find solitude to sit, observe and question your thoughts to know your truth and it will set your mind free.

The Thai culture is pleasant and brings out my true nature.

free wellness in the park!

What I love most about the Thai culture is that wellness is their way of life.  Visiting Lumpini Park from 5-7am was my favorite discovery of Bangkok.  It was filled with Thais of all ages, with the majority middle age and elderly, working out in the “playground”.  They know the importance of tai chi, yoga, meditating, massage and stretching.  The sidewalks are lined with vendors selling fresh, local real food that people buy on their way to and from work.  They even sit and with regular social gatherings bonding on the street and in the park. The Thais radiate an overall feeling of happy and relaxed.

delicious new discovery

One morning I discovered a new delicious fruit over breakfast called Ramutan, or Ngow in Thai. I was told that it’s only in season this month in Thailand.  One of the many things I love about the Thai culture is that they eat local and in season, not much processed food if at all. All of the cheap food is local.  Anything that they have to import is priced like we would pay in the States.  Even though that makes sense, it’s not like that in the States because the government subsidized the corn, wheat, soy, dairy and meat industries.  Those also take up most of our farmland and pollute our environment and bodies with chemicals. With the government subsidies Americans can eat cheap junk “food”, get sick and take medicine that cause disease. So then the doctors keep their jobs and the industries continue to make money.  My dream would be for the US government to instead subsidize organic vegetable farms and wellness services.  Since I’ve been in Thailand I haven’t seen any obesity, felt any anger or depression and that has everything to do with their lifestyle.

Thai massage "medicine"

As I move through each day, things are peaceful and pleasant.  I find myself reaching for the Bangkok Post and feeling good as I read the entire thing.  The front-page headline yesterday was “Crossing At Their Own Risk”, the top news story was about the police cracking down on jaywalkers and threatening to fine them 200 Baht ($6) for not using the pedestrian bridge or zebra crossing.   Even though the city is heavily populated like NYC, there is calmness about it.  I’ve noticed that I haven’t heard even one police or ambulance siren. Another difference are the homeless people.  They really can’t work and are amputees with missing limbs or are burn victims. My heart goes out to them and makes me want to give as they ask in prayer. There doesn’t seem to be any violence or craziness.

calm, relaxed and in line for the train

Thai people are peaceful, healthy, happy and polite.  Taking the Skytrain (BTS) is even pleasant because people are calm and relaxed. They even form lines where indicated while waiting for the train.  The Thais look you in the eye and smile.  They are light-hearted people who make life fun and easy. They joke and laugh about things that might be embarrassing or frustrating to Americans.  When I slipped down the staircase at my hotel they commented about how I like to make a grand entrance and laughed instead of worrying.  Laughter and joking around was apart of all of my treatments that made me feel more connected with my heart to the other person.  The masseuse, my first day at Health Land Spa, pretended to gently massage my new goddess tattoo and giggled which made me giggle and enjoy her even more. They bow in sweet prayer when they say thank you (korb kun ka), and they thank you after any purchase including the 7-11.  I love the culture and way of life here and it brings out my true nature that is calm, relaxed, peaceful and filled with joy!

detox, yoga/pilates, spa and raw food

My soul was craving this trip and now I know why.  Since I’ve been living from and listening to my heart I make decisions and know why after.  I felt a very strong calling to Thailand for many years and decided to release everything I own and move there.  The two questions I was most often was asked by others were; “Why Thailand?” and “How long will you be there?”  My answers were always “I’ve felt a strong desire to be there” and “I don’t know”. This was not a trip that I heard of or researched about, it came from my soul.  The soul’s desire cannot be understood until that desire if fulfilled.  This is the difference when making decisions from the heart and not the mind.  The second question is interesting.  When I moved to Atlanta, Ft. Lauderdale, back to Atlanta, up to NYC, back to Atlanta, over to San Francisco and back to Atlanta not once did I get anyone ask me “For how long will you live there?”  It’s probably because anything foreign, even concepts, to most people make them scared and they have a need to know the future.

Planning and thinking in the future is very limiting and blocks the flow and pleasure of life.

home is where my luggage is

It just turned midnight on July 25, 2009 and I’m settling in at Gate100 waiting for my flight from SFO to BKK. I’ve shed my old life to transition into something new. Leaving everything behind, I am left with myself, which is the best place to start.

I have never been to Asia in this lifetime and felt a pull to Thailand for many years. With no rational thought I decided to release everything I owned and move across the world. With no regrets and no return plans. This journey comes from my heart, listening to and trusting my higher self.

Canceling my AT&T wireless account was the last tie (and bill) to the US that is now shut off. Gmail and Facebook will keep me in touch with my friends and family when I want to plug in. I’m craving silence, solitude and a fresh start with a new life living from my heart. Exploring, learning, and teaching others lies ahead in my journey abroad. How it unfolds I leave to mystery and faith.

Feeling the best I ever have in 2008, I reflect on how I finished the year 2007.  I decided to clear out all in my life that wasn't working for me, and drained me of my energy.  This included what I put in my body, how I treated (and worked) my body, how I interacted with others and myself and what I did for a living.  Last December meant detox or clearing out the old to make space for the new.  I decided to start the New Year off right, already in motion of how I want to be.  Why wait till January 1st every year, why can’t we decide when we want to make changes and make that our New Year?  Let’s not give something up, let’s take something back. 

Think differently, embrace yourself and your desires and TAKE YOUR POWER BACK!
Taking your power back does not mean becoming powerful, it is to be empowered.  To live your life for you, to know what you need, to make decisions based on your needs and to prioritize how you spend your days, what you think about, spend your energy on and how you live your life based on what you value.  Your top priority is YOU and you should value yourself over anything and anyone.  Your power comes from thinking and acting with YOU IN MIND.

Where did it go?  Did you ever have it?  Are you living true to who you are?  Are you making the right decisions for you and what you need?

Self awareness and awakening brings inner happiness and peace.  Being self aware is being able to know what is yours and what isn’t.  Why do you do what you do, why do you wear what you wear and why do you think the way you think.  Did others tell you who you are and who you aren’t, what looks good and bad, and how you should feel?  Give yourself space before concluding if it’s true to you.  How you really feel in your heart is the truth.

Recognize the ways you give your power away and learn the practices to gain your power back, take responsibility for your life and become empowered.  “I gave that man the best years of my life!”  Now that is giving your power away, but it is also an untrue statement.  They can’t be your best years if you gave them away, they weren’t yours.  The best years of your life is when you start giving to you. The best gift in life comes from you and never stops giving.